


A Tale of Sound and Fury

by QuinntheEskimo



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Letters, Loss, M/M, One Shot, Tragedy, Vignette
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2015-04-16
Packaged: 2018-01-14 04:18:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1252537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuinntheEskimo/pseuds/QuinntheEskimo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of Dragon Age one-shots, published as I go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player  
> That struts and frets his hour upon the stage  
> And then is heard no more: it is a tale  
> Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,  
> Signifying nothing."
> 
> ~Macbeth

The sky was pale gray, shot through with the reds and violets of the setting sun. Almost beautiful if one could forget the horrific deed that had produced it. The explosion that had rocked the city, that would soon rock the world off of its feet. His vision blurred a bit has Hawke shifted his sight from the sky to the bodies that lie at his feet. Orsino was waiting for him to join the mages in the Gallows. He had but one thing left to do, before he went to face down the Knight Commander.  
  
 _Anders.... oh Maker. What Anders has done...this is unforgivable._  
  
Hawke slowly walked towards where Anders perched on the crate, staring into his hands. The mages back was to him, slumped forward like a broken marionette. The man just sat there, a shadow of the impassioned healer that Hawke had fallen in love with. He had long suspected his lover was planning something drastic. The argument in his clinic, not a week before, had cemented it in his mind. But he had never dreamed...  
  
This was too much. This was what everyone feared mages could do. Anders had to know how much chaos this would bring, how much death would ensue.  
  
"Anders...."  
  
"It had to happen, love. There can be no compromise." Anders said. "I am sorry... Maker, I am sorry for how far I had to go. But I had to do it." He looked up into Hawkes eyes, and there was no fear. Instead, he saw anguish, but also purpose. "And now you know what you have to do. Every revolution needs a martyr, Garret." he faltered for a moment. his gaze dropped. "And those that I have sacrificed deserve justice too." he added in a hoarse whisper.  
  
Hawke knelt,. "I don't... I can't. I can't kill you, Anders." he said brokenly. He twined his fingers into the golden strands of hair and placed his forehead against his lovers. Blue met gold as Hawke struggled to keep emotion from overcoming him.  
  
"The mage wants to die, Hawke. Kill him already."  
  
He heard the words from a few feet away, but he couldnt bring himself to turn and look to Fenris. Couldnt bring himself to argue with the warrior over Anders, especially when he knew the elf was right.   
  
He pulled the dagger from his belt slowly. trying to delay the final moment, even though he knew he shouldnt drag this out. He had taken a knife to his own sister in the Deep Roads. And he had never thought he would again have to murder a loved one.   
  
Anders kissed Hawke softly. just a chaste meeting of lips, but it held every scrap of love the two of them had ever shared. "Don't feel guilty, Garret Hawke. You're doing what is right." he whispered against hawkes lips. "I love you."  
  
"I forgive you." Hawke whispered back, as he plunged his blade into Anders' heart.  
  
The mage gasped softly, just a tiny intake of air, and then he sluped forward into Garrets arms. He laid the man down upon the dirty street, closing the golden eyes that had entranced him for eight years. Smoothed his golden hair one last time.   
  
And then he stood, turning his back on the man he had loved so completely. He drew his blades, squaring his shoulders, and headed towards the Gallows.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawke didn't come back from the Fade. Fenris is finding out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its 3 am. Lets go on a feels trip.

Fenris had been waiting for the letter for weeks. Waiting to hear something, anything. Hawke had been gone for over half a year, since the first letter had arrived from Varric asking for help. News was hard to come by in this remote little village on the ass end of Fereldan. But even so, if there was positive news to be had, it should have arrived by now.

So the letter sitting before him filled him with trepidation. He wanted to know. But he also dreaded what the letter might hold. The soldier that delivered it said nothing, just handed it to him and left, making the situation seem even more grim.

He pulled a small knife from his boot and slipped it beneath the wax seal, took a deep breath, and opened it.

Even as many years as he had been reading, it was still a bit of a struggle to decipher Varric's unruly scrawl. But when he read his name at the top, his actual name, his stomach dropped. Varric never used his name. He'd been Broody for 9 years.

_Fenris,_

_I don't even know how to start this. There's some things you need to know, and its going to hurt. But Hawke.... wont be coming back._

_Somehow he got pulled into the Fade. Physically. Hell if I know how, but the Inquisitor ripped a hole in reality to save them, and there they were. I know you don't care about the details right now, so I'll spare you, but at the end of it, someone had to stay behind to give the others time to escape. And Hawke volunteered. He saved he life of the Inquisitor, along with several others, by staying. I guess it was just in his nature to go out as a hero._

_I'm sorry. I'm so very sorry to tell you this. I'm sorry I cant be there to tell you in person. This isn't news that should be written in a letter. I'm sorry I pulled Hawke into this. He would still be with you if I hadn't needed his help. Ill understand if you don't want to hear from me again._

_I'm sending another letter with all the details, once I can get it sorted out enough to write it. If you need anything from me, anything at all, please let me know._

_I'm sorry. I'll miss him too._

_Varric_

The first thing that hit Fenris was fury. How could Varric let this happen? How could Hawke do something so stupid? Didn't he know Fenris needed him?

But the rage was short lived. It wasn't Varrics fault. Hawke knew the risks. Hawke was a self sacrificing hero to his core. Staying behind to save others sounds like just the way he would want to go.

Next, like a wave crashed down the guilt. He should have been there. Should never have let Garrett convince him to stay here, to protect these helpless villagers from demons when hawke was endangering himself. 

He finally noticed the second piece of paper stuck to the first. He pulled them apart gently and almost choked when he recognized Hawkes handwriting.

_Fenris._

_If your reading this, I didn't return from Adamant. And Varric will be blaming himself, but its not his fault. And its not yours either. Honnleath would be gone without you there and you know it._

_I want you to know that there are many things I wish I had done differently. But there's only one thing I truly will regret, and that's leaving you alone. I'm sorry I wont be there by your side. But we were never the growing old type anyways. We always knew one of us would die in battle, and the other would be left to carry on._

_There should be a group of Inquisition soldiers on their way to the village as you read this. It happens to be the hometown of an old friend of ours, and he is inclined to protect it. The people will be safe. So I want you to come here, to Skyhold. You and Varric will need each other. And you need a battle to fight. Consider this my last request._

_I'm forever grateful for the years I had with you. And always know that you are the one true light in my life._

_All my love,_

_Garrett._

Fenris felt... hollow. Like his whole being had been scraped raw and left to rot. Hawke had been so much of his life, it was hard to comprehend life beyond him. Life without him. He went to the bed (the bed they shared, the one they never would again...) and reached for the small oak chest that sat hidden beneath. He opened it up slowly, almost reverently, and pulled out a ragged strip of red velvet. He ran it between his fingers slowly, lost to memories.

Hes wasn't sure how long he sat there, fiddling with a bit of cloth, but when he finally looked up, he realized the sun was almost set. 

He tore a strip of black linen from a tunic sitting on the floor, and tied it around his wrist. Then he tied the ragged velvet over top. His last little tribute to the man who saved him ten times over. Saved him from slavers, from magisters, from himself. Saved him from a lifetime of fear and self loathing, a life without love. And by the Maker, he would fufill his last request.

This house held only memories now. Memories that hurt more than they comforted.

Tomorrow he would leave for Skyhold.


End file.
